When who’s your daddy is a multiple choice question…
Paranormal Psychologist Matilda Schmidt is one client away from fa-la-la-la-losing it. Holiday cheer is in the air, gun-toting fruitcakes are in her office, and she’s spinning through mood swings fast enough to make her toss her cookies–even without the morning sickness.
When Ol’ Kris Kringle goes AWOL after a nervous breakdown, his disgruntled elf is convinced that only Matilda can get him back on his sleigh in time to keep humans from tearing each other apart quicker than couponeers at a Black Friday sale.
But their efforts hit the skids when the men in Matilda’s life show up and demand to know which of them is responsible for the bun in her oven: the hot hit man who’s likely to stuff her stocking with ammunition, or the delicious demigod who’s made Santa’s naughty list a couple centuries running.
I like gravy.
This has nothing to do with the rest of my bio, but I thought you ought to know.
About the writing thing…
I wrote my first play when I was six and made my brothers perform it for my parents. I charged gum wrappers for admission (a steal, in my opinion, considering I had handed out the gum wrappers ahead of time). While I seriously doubt you’ll be seeing any of my formative work on Broadway anytime soon, I can credit these early experiments with the first of many important lessons I learned about writing: no matter how brilliant your manuscript is, some kid can go streaking butt-ass nekkid across the living room, and totally undermine your vision.
Everyone watches the naked kid because running across the living room with your cheeks flapping in the breeze is friggin’ hilarious.
Cue the lightbulb moment. People like funny stuff!
I never quite gave up on the writing thing, even as I tried my hand at being a dusty academic turned Executive Assistant (they paid me to nag! How cool is that?), but in those quiet moments when expense reports had been filed and to-do items checked off, the funny people in my head kept talking to me.
Yes, I know they have medication for that. It’s called vodka.
Since they discourage drinking at work, I started writing instead. What came out was an amalgamation (vocabulary!) of all the things I love: funny stuff, art, psychology, food, people, and paranormal critters!
Et voila! The Case Files of Dr. Matilda Schmidt, Paranormal Psychologist were born.
When I’m not sitting in my office watching cat videos and pretending to write, I like cooking, knitting (badly), and reading anything that makes me laugh (like my bank statements).
I live in Colorado with my brilliant husband and three surly cats.
Want to catch up on the rest of this Amazing Series? Well here is your chance!
Book One Unlovable is Free!!
Unlovable – http://amzn.to/1xoo9mg